We can want the best, or more, for someone but they must want it for themselves. Oh, how I would love to be able to box up “the best” and tie it up with a big, beautiful, shimmering bow and give it to some people. The truth is, unless they value what you are giving them, once they unwrap it, they are likely to sit the box of goodness on the shelf and allow it to collect dust.
A child at Christmas only plays with the toys that they want at the time. If you buy them a telescope and they want Pokemon cards (if those are still a thing) the telescope will get tucked away somewhere.
We can send our children to the finest, most expensive schools, but whether or not they choose to RECEIVE the benefit of the education is entirely up to them. A lot of parents have spent their life savings sending their children to school and the only education the child received was how to play beer pong.
We can show those we care about the means to a healthier life, but if they want to keep eating “carbage” – donuts, soft drinks, etc. – that is exactly what they are going to do.
Excuses will be the tell tale sign. Let’s choose a healthy lifestyle for instance. “It is too expensive.” “I cannot give up donuts.” “I like going out to eat.” “I do not have time.” I guarantee even if you remove every single one of those excuses, they will find another one, because they are not ready to receive the gift nor are they ready to commit to change.
We can continue to value all of these things ourselves and hope to someday motivate or inspire them. We can be a great example. Some of these positive role models actually played an integral role in my recent transformation. Ultimately, I had to become tired of where I was. The words “enough” had to come out of my mouth. Even with that, I could be shown the way but I, myself, had to invest the time and sweat. Someone wrapping up the gift of fitness in a box would have done nothing for my thighs! My husband did, in fact, wrap up the gift of a trainer, but I had to go do the work! If not, that trainer might be suffocating in that box right now!
In a marriage, I feel it is our gift to our spouse to be the very best that we can be. We should challenge one another to be that best. Unfortunately, it does not always work out that way. It takes a strong and tireless person to stay motivated when the other is content. Either the strong, motivated one will eventually inspire the other or the content one will dampen the spirit of the other – at least in most cases. I am sure you are familiar with the quote, “Don’t let anyone dull your sparkle!” This happened to someone very close to me. It is quite sad to see someone that used to shine, full of life, zeal, and energy sitting on the sidelines. The very best combination is two like-minded individuals with similar goals and dreams. That can be quite hard if one person wants to eat crap from drive-thru windows and watch television while the other wants to get rock hard abs and watch their intake.
It is really important to surround ourselves with people that are where we want to be, people that motivate, inspire, and challenge us. I am not saying that we cannot be friends with people who have different values and priorities. I am not saying that at all. But, just like in high school, we have to be intently aware of the influence those we associate with will have on us, on the beliefs we accept and our behaviors, and ultimately, our actions. We cannot afford to allow anything or anyone to distract us from our vision. The cost is simply too high.
Wanting more for someone else can be so frustrating when they do not want it for themselves! It all goes back to the fact that the only person that you have control over is you. Want more for YOU! Go after it! You just may have to leave some people sitting on the sidelines. Trust in the fact that they are watching you from there. Whatever you do, do not sit there with them and watch life pass you by.
No excuses. Win at your own game – whatever your game may be! Health. Fitness. Business. Self-improvement. Career goals. Run your own race. Lead the way.
Until Next Time,